Lois Metzger: Some Things I Learned
While Writing A Trick of the Light
The sheer numbers of people with eating disorders: the National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA) estimates that 30 million people in this country have eating disorders at some point in their lives. At any time, 10 million people have eating disorders, and at least 10 percent are male, which means at least one million men and boys—who are less likely to seek out or find treatment because eating disorders are still considered “girl diseases.”
My book is fiction, but the narrator—also known as the “eating-disorder voice” or the “anorexic voice”—is very real. I’ve seen it described in other books (fiction and nonfiction) as an ever-present “green, scaly creature with a large beak,” “the dictator,” “the beast,” “a drumbeat, a howl,” and a voice that “didn’t seem to be me doing the talking. Not any part of me I’d ever encountered, anyway.”
People with eating disorders often have food rituals. In my book, Mike eats only five bites per meal and arranges food on his plate so it resembles a clock face. While researching eating disorders, I spoke to young men who chewed food and spit it out, who only ate at night and never during sunlight hours, who only ate burnt toast.
Many people with eating disorders suffer from “body dysmorphia”—believing that one’s appearance is hideous and flawed, and ruminating about this for more than one hour a day. They may look in the mirror and actually see a distorted image. A healthy body can appear grotesquely overweight. Even an emaciated body can appear “fat.”
People may want to lose a few pounds in order to look good or feel fit. When people with eating disorders lose weight they endanger their health. Their hair and eyelashes may fall out, and cuts and bruises don’t heal. They may get a soft coat of fuzz on their faces, backs and chests (because of a lack of food, the body can no longer produce heat, and this hair is the body’s attempt to keep warm). They have trouble sleeping because the body won’t let them rest—it goes into starvation mode and stays alert because it wants to find food and eat. Due to a lack of calcium, they may develop osteoporosis. They can’t stand up straight and their bones can break from a simple fall. Too little potassium can result in weakened heart muscles, which can lead to a heart attack (in fact, the mortality rate for eating disorders is as high as 20 percent). So the intent—to look good and feel fit—has been lost. They are cold all the time, and hungry all the time, and can’t sleep, even while they protest that they are not freezing, not famished, not exhausted.
Which was something else I learned. People with eating disorders lie a lot because they have to hide the fact that they have eating disorders. This is why the narrator of my book—the “anorexic voice”—lies all the time. It is the quintessential “unreliable narrator.”
Because people with eating disorders deny they are ill, and because eating disorders can escalate so quickly and are so deadly, friends and family have to take action. A good first step is to call NEDA: 1-800-931-2237.
About the Author
About the Book
by Lois Metzger
Genre: Contemporary
Paperback: 208 Pages
Publication: September 23, 2014
by Balzer + Bray
Mike Welles had everything under control. But that was before. Now things are rough at home, and they’re getting confusing at school. He’s losing his sense of direction, and he feels like he’s a mess. Then there’s a voice in his head. A friend, who’s trying to help him get control again. More than that—the voice can guide him to become faster and stronger than he was before, to rid his life of everything that’s holding him back. To figure out who he is again. If only Mike will listen.
Author: Crystal
A story girl at heart, Crystal is a bibliophile who can easily spend the day immersed in a good read. She writes under the name Kristy Wang. You can follow her writing adventures on X and Instagram @_kristywang.
Tia Dalley says
I had no idea that so many men and boys had eating disorders. I want to read the book because I love fiction based on fact and I can learn so much from this story.
Alex D says
I think it's brilliant to show that anyone can have an eating disorder, not just women, and that there are other signs beyond weight loss to look out for. My little brother struggles with his body dysmorphia and there are a shocking number of people who believe that men can't feel such a way about their bodies.
Haley Scully says
I knew that eating disorders created a lot of problems for the people affected, but I never knew that the problems were to that extent. I want to read this book because it seems interesting, and I like the idea of viewing an eating disorder through a male point of view. I like that the author shows that anyone can have an eating disorder.